Yesterday was a day I tried to keep myself busy.
Taking care of details with my Mom’s assets, trying to do a few things around the house, getting a haircut, anything I could to avoid thinking about what was to come later.
The viewing I had arranged for my mother was from 7 to 9 pm at the funeral home here in town.
The drive there was at best uncomfortable for me.
My breathing came faster and harder as I walked down the isle and approached my Mother’s coffin.
I cried as I knelt down beside her.
As I held her hands, they were cold to the touch, as they were on Monday at the hospital.
I was hoping that somehow, someway, her eyes would open again and she would smile at me again and hold my hand.
My wife Susan was very hard hit by the reality of seeing my Mother at rest, and she and my Daughter wept in unison.
Two of my Mother’s past co-workers came to say good by, and some of my friends and co-workers were also present with me, chief among those, my friend and brother in arms Ken and his girlfriend Candace.
I was also surprised by a friend who happened to work at the funeral home, my friend Jeannette ( more irony, as she shares my Mother’s first name ) who I hadn’t seen for some time and I admit did not recognize at first.
While I was glad for the people that had come to pay their respects, I was also disappointed by the people who had not. Most were people who I worked with, who I purposely had made this evening viewing for, due to some things that were said to me after my father’s passing, and so again I have seen who are my friends and who are not and I will remember.
Today is the day I lay my Mother to rest, next to my Father.
Tomorrow will be the day that I celebrate for my Mom….
While still in the hospital, I had told my Mom of the huge lobsters that I had seen in Shoprite, and had promised her that when she came home that we would share one together. Tomorrow, I will keep that promise, raising a fork and a glass in celebration of my Mom and her life…but that is tomorrow…today I lay my Mother to rest…and today I mourn her passing…I am her only child…I am her only son…